Way To F**k Up My Day

So today is my actual birthday. The day started out good cause I woke up next to a hot boy! It doesn't get a whole lot better than that! How quickly it goes down hill by getting one voicemail....

While I was out having my early smoke at work, I left my cell phone sitting on my desk. When I got back, there was a voicemail. It was from my dad.... A man I haven't spoken to in over 3 years. I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact he actually called me or that he sounded so old and crippled. FUCK...This has totally thrown me off.

My parents divorced when I was 5 after the tragic death of my youngest sister. By dad was a wife beater, but I don't remember all that. He's also an alcoholic. I've conveniently blocked out most of the early parts of my life. One day when my dad was at work, my mom took us three kids and left. The only things we took were the things that we could take on the airplane back to Pennsylvania. Later when my parents reconciled, well I shouldn't say reconciled, perhaps it's better said that they came to speaking terms again in order for him to have a relationship with us, we went down to Florida and spent time with him. He was the fun parent and when we got home, I know my mom felt like shit because of all the fun we had with him, while she spent her days slaving away at 3 different jobs and didn't do anything with us.

Years later, only after I grew up a little and was dealing with my own "fun parent" issues, (because I'm not the fun parent), I realized what an asshole my dad really was. It was actually when I had taken the boys down there on vacation and my dad flipped the hell out because my oldest son, Brandon, had drank one of his lemonades... He was screaming at a 3 year old over some canned lemonade. He used to scream at my mom like that, I do remember that... Needless to say, after that, we drifted apart for a couple of years.

My stepmom came over to Ohio a few years after that stopping through Columbus on her way to Pennsylvania. We all had dinner with her and it was pleasant I guess. I think she was still in Columbus when the call came. My dad had been found at work passed out at his desk. Apparently he'd been having wicked headaches for quite some time and when he ate he was puking and passing out. Luckily he works at the fire department and they were able to get him to the hospital immediately. God knows what would have happened had he been home alone. My stepmom rushed back to Florida to see what was going on. Within days, she called to tell us that he had a brain tumor and that we needed to come down and say our goodbyes because even if they could get all of it, he probably wouldn't be the same. My mom paid for me and my sister to fly down and meet our other sister in Orlando, then head further south to see him.

Before he went in for his operation we all said what we needed to say. Needless to say, it wasn't very nice, but there were some things that needed to be said, just in case we never got the chance again. To make a long story short, he made it through the surgery and seemed ok when he came out. It looked like he was going to make a full recovery, so the next day, we were on our way back home. Over the next year, he was in and out of the hospital with various things going on with his head. He even had to have a couple more surgeries. I kept minimal contact, checking in when I needed to, wondering if he remembered any of the things that were said to him before that first surgery.

On what was supposed to be one of the happiest days of my life, when I got engaged, I called to let him know. I don't know what I expected, my sister had just gotten married 6 months earlier and he was there and everything. I DID NOT expect him to say "Why the hell would you want to do something like that?" when I told him I was getting married. I hung up the phone and cried in the Walmart parking lot. Needless to say, that was the end of my relationship with him. Should I have been surprised that he said that? Absolutely not. He's a dickhead that had two failed marriages and now has a wife that for the life of me I don't understand why she's still with him.

He called a few weeks later to see what my wedding plans were. I didn't call him back. When he found out that I was heading to Vegas to get married, he called again to basically tell me I was going to hell for not getting married in a church. This is from the man who, if he stepped foot in a church, it would probably burn to the ground....I didn't call him back. My mom and stepdad were the only people in Vegas with us when we got married. It made me happy. People tried to book flights to come out, but it was a big fight weekend and airfare was sky high. They all settled for watching it live over the internet. My stepmom went to my sister's house and watched it. My dad didn't. I didn't even get a card from him. Whatever. Such is life I suppose.

Apparently he's been in and out of the hospital again and is having violent episodes. He was locked up in a nut house for awhile. I thought he was still there.... It was 3 years ago in April the last time I talked to him, so tell me, why the fuck did he call me today? I've had two other birthdays since then that he didn't bother with. My kids have had birthdays and he didn't bother. Hell, I HAD A FUCKING BABY and he didn't bother.

Why's he gotta ruin my day? I don't know, but as normal with me, I'm not calling him back.....