Apparently I Had A Good Night.....

So, I was just looking through my pictures from my sister's 30th birthday party on Friday night and didn't even realize half of them had been taken.  It always makes me laugh when I look at pictures after my camera's been sitting on the table all night.  People just can't seem to leave the camera sit there.  Here's some of the funniness on the camera this week.  Not even close to being as good as boobs, but entertaining none the less....

How cute are we?  If my bra strap wasn't hanging out it'd be better, but hey, that's what Photoshop is for.....

WTF?  Apparently one of the guys likes flat asses and panties hanging out......

I have no idea what's going on here except for the fact that I might be choking on something.....

Me getting ready to slide my ass down the skate ramp after dancing

Oh yeah, and my new shirt I bought for the night seemed to have ripped somehow....... Mike's looking at me like I'm retarded as usual.....

The hot blond is the birthday girl.  I don't think she ended up on the pole, but I was a little off in my own world for a little bit and the next thing I know she's being shuffled into the car before there's a problem....

I lost my camera again Friday night.  Good thing Nicole is always looking out for it.  She couldn't keep hers to save her life, but lately she's got mine.  I couldn't hook back up with her on Saturday night to get it before the big party with some of my OLD peeps from back in the day.  I don't mean old as in age, I mean old as in haven't seen since high school.  The camera would have been great since I saw some people I haven't seen in FOREVER.  Oh well, shit happens....

That's about it for now.  I'm suffering from a specific form of insomnia, butter known as Lackaboyinmybed, which causes me to hog the entire California King and not get one bit of sleep.  Guess I'll have to make a phone call later because I've GOT to get some sleep before heading to PA for the weekend where it is damn near impossible to sleep at all due to 20 people staying in the same house. Ugh, I really hate going over there, but it's like my mom says, my grandparents won't be around forever......

Why I'd Like To Kill My Child

Friday night I was getting ready to go out and Gavin came into the bedroom to show me something, as he put it.  He could barely move his fingers on his right hand.  "What did you do?" I asked.  "Something stupid" he said.  Fucking great, I'm thinking.  I didn't think it looked too bad, so I shooed him out of the room and told him we'd look at it again on Saturday to see if it got any worse.

Saturday morning I had forgotten about it and took him to soccer practice, cursing the fact that I was out all night and my kid had to be somewhere at 10am.  Damn soccer coach.  Obviously he doesn't have a social life.  After practice Gavin got in the car and said "My hand really hurts".  Gavin doesn't complain about pain, so I knew we had a problem on our hands.  Well, that and the fact his hand was swollen as big as an orange now.  Fuck.  I made plans for someone to watch the baby and we headed off to the urgent care.

I really can't say enough about the Children's Hospital system in Columbus.  Everyone in that place was very kind and attentive, freely giving out stickers and freeze pops every time someone came in the room.  Gavin is a little too old for all this treatment, but he was digging it in between having several nervous breakdowns all having to do with the bone being broken and the possibility of having to have it set. 

Turns out, it's broken.  Not just a hairline fracture or something little like that.  It's broken all the way through and slightly out of position, but we're going to have to wait for the swelling to go down to see if it's going to need set.  What do they call the injury Gavin got?  The boxer's fracture.  The orthopedic guy explained to Gavin that nobody breaks this particular bone unless they're hitting something or someone.  What did my child hit?  His friend in the head.....  They were play boxing and Gavin got punched a little too hard in the stomach and in turn punched his friend in the head.....  Stupid kid.  Now we're on hold for spring soccer until after he gets evaluated by the orthopedic doctor.  WTF?  I spend THOUSANDS of dollars a year on this kid and soccer.  We're only 1 week away from tournaments every weekend for the next 5 weeks and he may not be able to play in any of them.

What am I going to do about it?  Make them cast it whether they want to or not when we go to the ortho doctor.  That way we can bubble wrap it and he can still play.  Kids do it all the time.  As long as it's covered and not a threat to the other kids, we should be good to go..... We'll see what happens, but I figured I'd include a picture of him with his nice splint and My Little Pony sticker.

 Yeah, he's a goofy little fucker :)

Have a good Monday everyone!

Really? It's Been A Week??

My apologies for not being around this week.  I've got stuff going on, just not a whole lot to write about I guess.  We'll do a week in review just in case I forgot something.....

Friday night I went out with a bunch of people to hear a band.  It was ok.  Cameron was my companion for the night and annoyed me pretty much the entire time.  It didn't help that they didn't have any Bacardi Limon, so I wasn't really feeling it.  We decided to head over to my sister's bar since we were already up that way and had a better time over there, where I did manage to catch a buzz.  Here are some of the pics.  Apparently Dave got a lot of boobie in his face.....

Nicole & Tara

Dave & Cass

I think there's something to be said for being the fat funny guy.....  All the girls like some Dave :)

We get back to the house LATE.....  Dave stays for a minute and then it's just me and Cameron.  He is so fucked up you could probably ask him his name and he wouldn't know it.  We're talking and he tells me that he wants to be with me..... Not as in have sex.  As in be in a relationship.  I would have rather he meant sex.  He was all serious and shit.  I'm laughing.  He's not.  WTF?  He goes on and on about how I'm a really cool girl and he could see himself starting a life with me and blah, blah, blah....  At this point I want to barf.  What happened to just hanging out and having a good time?  I told him that I didn't think that was a possibility.  He's got too much wrong with him, not the least of which was me seeing him snorting Percocet more than once since Wednesday night.  Who does that???  He assured me that he only did that sometimes.  Yeah right.  I know that game.  Not having it buddy.  Finally he passes out.  THANK GOD.

I had to be up early for soccer on Saturday so I pushed Cameron out the door assuring him I'd call him later.  For the record, I didn't.  Saturday night we got blown off for our tattoos, prompting me to ask Tattoo Guy if he even wanted to do them.  I know plenty of other people who tattoo for a living who'd do it without and problems.  He assured me that it was just because they ran out of something that he needed was the only reason he couldn't do it.  Whatever.  If it's not done this weekend, we're going elsewhere. 

Earlier that day I was texting back and forth with my friend Brad, who is in the hospital.  He asked me if I'd come up and visit.  His wife works nights and he was bored, so I went up.  It was probably the most enjoyable two hours of my weekend, just talking about old times and how things used to be.  It was a nice diversion from the partying that I'd been doing pretty much all week.  I feel bad for him though.  He's got a bone disease and just recovered from a broken femur only to have his wife give him a hug that broke his jaw.  There is pretty much nothing they can do to help his condition and from the few people that I have spoken to that have known him since childhood he wasn't even expected to live this long.  I guess maybe I should have spent more time paying attention to stuff like that when we dated....

I had my phone turned off while I was at the hospital.  Tara was being weird about me going somewhere and not telling her where.  It's rare that I don't tell her where I'm going, but every time I mention Brad she's like EWW why do you talk to him, blah, blah, blah, so needless to say I just said I had something to do and I'd be back in the hood later.  I turned on my phone as I was walking out of the hospital and had like 20 texts from the hood wondering where I was and inquiring as to my safety. 

First of all people, I'm 31 years old.  I've lived in some of the shittiest parts of town.  Going down to a hospital on campus isn't the worst thing I've ever done.  I know how to take care of myself.  Just because I didn't get a permission slip to leave the hood doesn't mean that I'm in danger or that I'm doing something scandalous.  I shot back some nasty texts and told them I'd be back to my side of town in 20 minutes.

Everyone was drunk when I arrived.  Big surprise.....  One of my friends, Mary, was there and I hadn't seen her in forever, even though she only lives two streets over.  We were having a nice conversation when my arch nemesis, Shelli, rudely interrupts the conversation trying to tell us a bigger, better story.

Let's pause for a minute.  I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE BUTT INTO CONVERSATIONS HAVING BEEN THERE, DONE THAT AND HAVE A BIGGER, BETTER STORY.  It pisses me off.  This bitch has to do it every single time somebody says something.

Needless to say, since I didn't even have a buzz, I flew off the handle and pretty much told her how everyone hated her and that she was a big fat liar.  She sat down and cried for a minute, then tried apologizing.  I wasn't having it.  I raised my hand to hit her and thought better of it.  I took an open handed swing and knocked her full drink flying into the bushes.  She didn't need it anyway, her eyes were going two different directions like a fish.  With that, I was out.  Back down to the house by 11:30.  Did some stuff for soccer and was sleeping by midnight.

Sunday my plan was to lay in bed all day and do nothing.  My plan was squashed by Jordan texting me that he was bringing Ev home at 10am.  Alright then....  The child was evil all day.  I hope he gets used to this dual life thing and isn't shitty like this every time he spends time with Jordan.  Ugh.  I don't know that anything great happened the rest of the day.  I did talk to Cameron at some point, but it was brief, like "I'm going to bed, I'll talk to you tomorrow" sort of talking.

Fast forward to Wednesday.  It was the first nice day this week, so we had a fire at my place.  It was nice and at one point there were probably 20 people there.  That is absolutely my favorite thing.  Kids running around, adults sitting around the fire listening to music and having a good time.  I broke down and invited Cam over.  He'd been texting me good morning every day this week.  I was lonely and didn't have another option that night.  He got there and drank very little beer, I was like ok, cool.  Maybe he was being real when he said he wasn't as excessive as it looked.  We stayed out until around 11 and then went into the house.  He asked if he could pull the car into the driveway because he had a bunch of tools in it.  Yeah, fine.  10 minutes later when he came in, he was fucked up.  I was pissed.  So much so that I briefly entertained throwing him out.  I didn't though.  He couldn't even walk straight, let alone drive all the way to the other side of town.  Instead, when he asked what was wrong, I told him I was annoyed and going to bed.  I rolled over and tried to sleep while he entertained the Percocet itchies for the next two hours.  Needless to say, when I got up in the morning I felt like I hadn't slept at all.  He left and I told him I'd call.  I haven't.  He's texted me and I've answered a couple of times.  Nothing major though.  I think this morning he was trying to get the invite to go out tonight, but I didn't do it.  I don't need that shit.  He's a nice guy and all, but I can't deal with someone who's got demons like he has.... God knows I've got my own that I need to work through.

We have lots of plans this weekend, so I'll be spread pretty thin.  Tonight my escort is this guy we'll call Tuesday Night Guy.  He's pretty much my perfect companion right now.  He likes to hang out, no strings attached and if sex happens, it happens.  If we fall asleep watching basketball, that's ok too.  My kind of guy.....

Have a good weekend peeps!

Presents For Those Who Like Boobs.....

Since there were a some on Tara's camera of random chicks with HUGE hooters, here is my Friday present for my guy readers and the girl readers who like some boobs too :) Everyone enjoy your weekend!

This was Mike's Mardi Gras bead necklace he wore around all night.

St. Patty's Day Festivities Part 2

Where did I leave off?  Oh yeah, Lucky's.  So weird shit was going on in the bathroom at that place.  The first time I went in there was a girl sitting on the floor with her skirt up around her waist....  Like bare ass on the floor.  How freaking nasty is that?  Her friend was trying to coax her out telling her that she was going to get coochie germs from sitting on the floor.  At this point my buzz is kickin, so I'm in the next stall laughing.   I finish my business and go out to tell Tara about the girl on the floor, she goes running in to capture it on camera.  I got sidetracked by Cameron and didn't head back in, but these are the pictures I found on Tara's camera of what the was going on in there.... Apparently the one girl got off the floor because there aren't any pics of her...

WTF??

(Oh wait, I think this was her... I didn't notice she had legwarmers on when she was sitting down)

Where did she get the green beer goggles??

Again, WTF?? And who was she talking to on the phone? All her friends were with her...

At some point Tara and Mike left leaving me with Cameron and Dave.  We decided to go back to my house and chill.  Cassie had been texting us all night and was on her way home as well.  We all just laid around listening to music and chillin.   I don't remember what time Dave left and Cassie went to bed, but it was late...  The last time I looked at my phone before I passed out it was 3am.  They weren't still there, but I was still up.

When 6:30 rolled around and I had to get the kids up for school I was still drunk.  Oh shit, that's no good.  Brandon had court later in the morning over that damn pocket knife thing.  Luckily I got to go back to bed for a few and by 8:30 when I got up I was good to go.

Nobody thought Brandon was going to get charged for having the pocket knife at school.  Even the cop who took the report said since he'd never been in trouble that it wasn't going anywhere.  Much to my surprise, last month I got a summons for both of us to appear to charges of Possession of a Deadly Weapon.  I was shocked to say the least, but we went to court fully expecting that he'd plead guilty, get some community service since he wasn't a repeat offender and be done with it.  What actually happened was a totally different story.  

When we finally got to see the hearing officer I was told that Possession  of a Deadly Weapon is a Class 5 Felony.  The lowest felony you can get, but still a felony that would not be sealed even after he turned 18.  WTF?  I panicked as we were read the list of possible punishments which included my kid spending the next 5 years in a juvenile facility.  Just what in the hell were we supposed to do?  This is a good kid who made the mistake of not checking his pockets on the way out the door one morning, not the kid who got called back because he beat the shit out of his mother..... Or the kid who was making pipe bombs in his back yard.  That ones mother was telling me that my kid looked out of place there.  It was awful.  We ended up pleading not guilty, getting the forms for a public defender and setting a trial date.  The kid was good though.  He didn't show any emotion about the whole thing until he got in the car and had a meltdown.  I was proud he lasted that long.  I had to take him to be fingerprinted and then decided he was traumatized enough for the day, so we got lunch and I let him go home instead of going back to the hour he would have had left at school.

I talked to my mom about the situation and she immediately called my step-dad who called his lawyer.  He was referred to one who specializes in juvenile cases.  We're currently waiting to hear back from the guy.  My parents are picking up the bill for it simply because they know that it's some dumb shit that he's being charged like this and if Brandon goes to Juvie for the next 5 years, there's pretty much NOTHING that will bring him back to his old self.  He's such an emotionally fragile child that would just be the end of him. Ugh....

Needless to say, yesterday pretty much sucked.  I smiled though when my phone rang and it was Cameron thanking me for inviting him out Wednesday night.  He came over and hung out last night and we stayed up way later than we should have talking about what's gone on in our lives for the last 15 years.  Catching up with him has been really interesting and we're kind of both in the same place in our lives, so I guess we'll see what happens.  There's always the fact that I'm going to see Tattoo Guy tomorrow night which could potentially screw things up for me....  God, I'm so confused over boys right now.......

St. Patty's Day Festitivies Part 1

So yeah, I know, I've been slacking a little bit this week.  I am BUSY, BUSY, BUSY.  I mean, two soccer practices, dealing with Jordan and his demands with Ev, St. Patty's day festivities, and this new boy are consuming a lot of time right now.

Where to start?  Well, nothing super fun happened on Monday or Tuesday night except running kids around, so we'll just fast forward to Wednesday.  The plan?  Mike was picking up Tara and I to go out for a night of St. Patty's day activities.  Woo Hoo!  I'm the 6th toe with those two again......  I had talked to Cameron a couple of times, but since he lives clear on the other side of town and didn't wanna risk a DUI, he was unsure that he was going to come out.  We had tentatively made plans to go out for drinks on Thursday night just in case he decided not to show.

We get to the local watering hole and it's lame.  Like people with families eating dinner lame.  We decide to stick it out for a minute, pondering our other options......  DUI checkpoints all over the city quickly squash our hopes of going up to one of the biggest bashes in town.  The more green beads and drinks we have, the less lame the night gets.

Do you see that?  That big fucking zit on my chin?  WTF?  I have nice skin and doesn't it figure that right about the time I'm gonna see someone I haven't talked to in over a decade, I get a damn zit.  FML....  Anywho, look who showed up looking better than he did when I was 15......

Cameron.... Sorry for the shitty picture, but that's what happens when the other Tara is in charge of the camera.  Shitty pictures with the exception of all the boob pics.  For some reason those are perfectly clear... Go figure....

Anyway, the boys wanna eat at the watering hole while the girls prefer to just have a liquid dinner as usual. We decide to stay a little longer because some people we rarely get to see came out and quite honestly 5 Bacardi Limon and Red Bulls later I really didn't give too much of a crap what was going on.  Eventually Tara's psycho ex showed up and we had to get outta there because he was belligerently drunk and "accidentally" spilled his beer on her.  Alrighty then.  It's only like 10, so we head further down the street to Lucky's.  The local watering hole is an older crowd, this crowd at Lucky's isn't, but they're not sporting Affliction or Ed Hardy, so we're good.  Here's some more random pics of us at Lucky's:

(Ok, well this isn't any of my people but this dude was super annoying)

Can you tell I might like this boy a little?  The funny thing?  He remembers all sorts of stuff from back when we dated and was telling Tara stories.  Even funnier?  He remembers a couple years after we broke up we hooked up at a party just before it got busted and we had to crawl out the window half dressed and run into the woods to avoid the cops.  Oh yeah, good shit right there.....

I'm gonna go to a part 2 on this because Blogger is being stupid and won't put my pics up right.  To Be Continued......

Oh, Ha...Did I Forget To Mention This?

As Curious pointed out in yesterdays comments, I guess I did forget to mention I'm getting a tattoo.  Actually, for my first time, I'm getting three of them.  Hmmm.... Let's go back to last week.....

Thursday night all my girls were at my house. Tara, April (AC), Cassie, Trina(who is April's younger sister), and I were all laying around on my bed, drinking, Facebooking and just generally talking shit.  We decided we were all going to get a group tattoo. As funny as it sounded while we were drinking, each one of us was going to get a letter on our wrist that when we were all together spelled FUCK U (we figured we'd be able to talk another person into doing it too).  Lol, not half as funny when I'm sober....  Well, I know that April and Trina wouldn't go through with it anyway.  Cassie already has an idea of what she wants to get.

So that just left me and Tara.  A little back story here.  I'm 31 and don't have any tattoos.  My mother always beat it into our heads that they were trashy.  My sister Melissa immediately went out and got like 5 of them when she turned 18, I think my other sister Melinda has at least one.  I always told myself that I didn't want to get one because I didn't want something permanently marked on my body.  That really wasn't the reason.  While thinking about all of this since I met Tattoo Guy, I figured out what it really was.  Nobody I know only has one.  They describe the experience as addictive.  We all know I have enough problems with addictions....  That's the reason.....  Yeah, it may sound dumb to some of you, but that's the way I am.

Back to the story.  Tara and I have decided that we want to get something that symbolizes our friendship.  We were supposed to go on Sunday, but Tattoo Guy already had too many people backed up and he was touching up Nasty Coochie Tattoo Girl, so we really didn't want to go.  Instead we're going Saturday evening and my hopes are high that he'll want to hang out afterward.  I don't know why I'm so hung up on this guy.... Actually I do.  It's because he doesn't want me, or is at least acting that way for whatever reason.  I don't deal with rejection well, especially from guys, mostly because I'm the one that does the rejecting.  How dare they reject me?  Fucked up, yeah, I know......

Anyways, the picture at the top of the page is what we're getting.  A bad idea?  Maybe, but it fits the both of us so well.  The ex-husband calls us the Toxic Twins, so whatever.  We both like it.  It's not going to be anything big, a couple inches max put on my one ankle that doesn't have the big ass scar running all the way up it.  While hunting for what we wanted to get, I came across two words that I wanted as well, but don't fit with the design we picked out.  Matta & Bella, which are crazy and beautiful in Italian.  I'm getting one of the words on each wrist in small cursive as a reminder that yes, my life may be crazy, but it's beautiful at the same time.....

I'd Like To Be Able To Say.......

That I had a fabulous, fun-filled weekend..... Not so much.  This being single shit sucks.  Friday night was lame.  Cassie and I went up the street for a few drinks and dinner and were in bed by 11:30.  Saturday night Kyle wanted everyone to come out and see his new place, so we went out to his house where Tara's dude Mike was old enough to be everyone's dad.  This created some hostility in the 15 year old girls that were hanging out, because, you know, Tara and I are so fucking awesome and all........  Needless to say, a fight ensued and Tara kicked some dude so hard I would be surprised if he could walk the next day.  Dave (Lil D) happened to be standing right there and hit the dude square in the face.  Kyle flipped out and kicked everyone out.  Nobody left but us.  I'm not trying to be all up in some drama bullshit.  I thought we were just going out there to chill and little girls were upset that we took away some of the attention from them....

I was home, passed out by 12:30 because maybe after we left we went to the local watering hole and I was able to drown my sorrows about being old in one too many drinks....  Kyle came to the house to talk to me.  Luckily Nicole ran interference and didn't let him back to my room because her kid was in my bed too.  That was probably a good thing. I didn't have anything to say to him that wouldn't have ended in him getting a black eye for a comment Tara heard him say when he thought we were gone.  It was loads of ridiculousness...

Jordan came and picked up Ev around noon yesterday.  I went to breakfast with the entire crew, dropped Nicole off then went home and slept the rest of the day.  When I woke up around 5 I motivated enough to fold a couple loads of laundry, order pizza and piss around on the computer for a little bit.  Kyle was blowing up my phone texting me, but I wasn't having it.  At midnight I was still wide awake and thinking about Tattoo Guy.  I wanted to text him, but I know better.  Not doing that.....  I was supposed to see him yesterday for Tara and I to get our tattoos, but he already had too many people coming up there and it was his day off.  I guess I'll be waiting until Saturday to see him.  I still don't understand what his deal is and why he stopped talking to me, but whatever.  I guess we'll see what happens Saturday, because the plan is to go up there around 5, get the tattoos done then go out.

In other news, I'm meeting up with Cameron,  the guy from the Black & White post, on Wednesday night.  I texted him Saturday because he said he was interested in having drinks sometime and hello?? I'm so fucking lonely right now I can hardly stand it.  We're all going out for St. Patty's day and I invited him along.  That way if it goes badly at least my friends are there....  We'll see how all that goes, but I'm not holding my breath......

There's just so much going on right now, I can hardly keep it all straight.  Gavin started back into outdoor soccer, so we're back on a 4 day a week schedule with all that right now.  I've got Jordan up my ass about hanging out with Ev, Cassie and her kid in the house, Brandon has court for the pocket knife thing this week, I feel like I'm just going, going, going, which is probably why I slept the day away yesterday.  Oh well, it felt good. 

Everyone have a good week.  I've got some other stuff on tap, but I'm looking for some pictures to add into the stories right now.  If I can manage to get through them, I'll get it posted, otherwise it might be a few days :)

Who's Your Daddy?

 (Fat Boy food coma)

Last Friday Gavin called me to tell me the letter I was looking for was in the mail.  I had him read it to me, fully expecting the results I got.  All I had to do now was sit and wait for Jordan to call me.  He told me that he'd call when he was ready to talk about everything.  I was ok with this. 

What I didn't expect was that he would call me at 4:00 while I was still at work on Friday.  I had expected that it would be late on Saturday or sometime on Sunday when he called.  I figured that he'd need to mull over the fact that he was now a dad and talk with his girlfriend about the changes that this will bring to both of their lives.  Turns out, he's spent the last 7 weeks going over it and making plans because he knew that Ev wasn't the ex-husband's kid.  Jordan was there and was my protector when everything went down with the ex, so he knew it wasn't likely I was having sex with somebody who was punching the window out of my screen door, let alone the fact that the ex-husband is fixed.  I know, I know sometimes it doesn't work or whatever, but like I said, we weren't even living in the same house....

So Jordan and I talked.  He's moving to this side of town and buying a house to be close to Ev.  He wants to spend all the time he can with him.  It's kinda freaking me out a little.  It's always just been me and my kids.  The big ones NEVER go away for more than a day with my mom and it's pretty much been 24/7 with the little guy since he was born.  Anyways, we talked about a custody arrangement and agreed that we really need to sit down in person before our child support hearing in June and figure something out.  He wants shared parenting, but I don't know that I'm ok with all that right yet.  We'll see how things go.....

Towards the end of the conversation I asked him when he was interested in spending some time with the kid.  He mentioned that he'd really like to take him to his sister's birthday party that Sunday.  It would only be a couple of hours and would be a good way to introduce the baby to his family.  Ok, I was good with that.  See you Sunday then.

Saturday morning I slept in because we had been out late as usual the night before.  My sleep was interrupted my incoming text messages from Jordan.  He was out shopping for Ev and wanted to know what size of everything he wore.  I texted him back and forth for a little bit and he said he was really excited about Sunday.  Ok dude, good for you....it's 10am and I might still be drunk......Need sleep.....


Sunday at noon rolled around and Jordan showed up on time leaving his girlfriend in the car.  He came in and I was holding Ev.  We stood up and Ev reached out to grab his hat.  The kid is fascinated by hats and sunglasses.  He was good playing around with Jordan while I held him and we talked about what not to feed him and all that.  As soon as I handed him over the kid started to scream bloody murder.  I almost cried, but held firm telling Ev that I loved him and he'd have fun with his dad.  As soon as they were out the door I might have had to cry for a minute.  Brandon and Gavin weren't real happy about little brother going off with essentially a stranger, but they got over it and resumed their concert in Rock Band.

I really didn't know what to do while he was gone.  Thankfully Nicole called and wanted to go get something to eat.  I was more than happy to be her taxi for a few hours.  Jordan texted me while we were at lunch to let me know Ev had calmed down and was actually playing and having fun with his family.  I felt a little better.

When Jordan dropped him off, he complained that Ev was all stuffed up and perhaps needed to see a doctor.  I had to explain that's how all kids in daycare are in the winter.  They just keep passing the bug back and forth.  Jordan's solution?  Take the kid out of daycare.  His mom stays at home and can babysit. Uhhh.... As much as I'd like to be saving all the money I'm spending on daycare, which has essentially bankrupted me, I think it's a little soon for all that.  I politely declined for now and asked when he'd like to see him again.  He said Wednesday.  I said ok and that he should meet us at daycare so that he knows our routine there.

Wednesday rolls around and I leave work an hour early to meet him at daycare.  I had already let them know he was coming and to keep the kid clean.  I get there and his truck is already there.  I go inside and hear he's already back in the infant room.  When I get back there, he's sitting on the floor playing with Ev.  We go through the motions at daycare and he holds Ev the entire time.  I'm feeling a little left out.  They leave and I have some me time.

While Ev is gone, my sister Melissa's friend Cassie and her son show up to move in.  I didn't know Melissa, her husband and their kid were coming too.  Soon Tara and her kids are at the house and a barbecue has started.  WTF?  Ok, whatever.  I had plans for the evening but whatever.  Jordan texts to ask when Ev goes to bed and I tell him anywhere between 6:30 and 9:00 but most of the time right around 7.  He says he's going to give him a bath, get his pj's on and then bring him home.  Ok then.

He gets the kid home and drops a bomb on me.  "Can I have him again tomorrow?" he says.  Nope, mom's taking him since she hasn't seen him lately.   "Ok then, well I want to have him on Sunday then.  You know, keep him overnight." he said.  What?  I thought we agreed that no overnights until you were closer and had room to keep him overnight?  "Tara, I just want to see him as much as possible.  Bethany will watch him Monday while I'm at work and then I'll bring him home Monday night."  Ugh.  Ok, I guess that will work.

That's where we are right now.  I really respect that he's trying to do the right thing and all, I'm just feeling a little left out right now.  I guess it's because I really don't have a whole lot going on for myself right this second.  We'll talk about all that later........

Wanna see something amusing though?  Below are two pictures.  They look like the same kid don't they?  It's not.  The one on the left is Gavin when he was about a year old.  The other one is Ev just last week at daycare.  No wonder the big brother is so protective......

Sometimes It's Not Just Black & White

Boys....They're everywhere.....  Yesterday I had a blast from the past friend request on Facebook.  Cameron.  I met him when I first moved to Ohio and he was part of the neighborhood crew that we ran around with.  He was HOT and my mother disapproved of him because he was mixed, so it all stands to reason that I would start to date him eventually.  He had very little parental supervision so he would come to my house and throw pebbles at my window until I came outside to hang out with the rest of our friends at the park down the street which most of the time meant smoking pot and drinking 40's or Zima.  Ahh, those were the days.  When life was uncomplicated and all I had to worry about was not failing out of school and what all my friends were doing for the weekend.

I don't remember why we didn't work out.  It was probably because he was a nice guy and I probably dumped him for someone else.  Hey, that's how I roll.  What I remember the most about him is that he bought me a beautiful bracelet for Valentine's Day and my mother made me give it back to him (which I didn't.  I just didn't wear it around her).  She didn't want me dating him because what if I fell in love with him and wanted to get married, OMG, we'd have interracial babies.  God, that would just be a disaster!!!  Kids growing up not understanding why they weren't fully black or white and not being fully accepted by either color.  WTF? 

Seriously mom?  You are the person that is supposed to be shaping me into a well-rounded productive member of society and at 15 you were worried about me making interracial babies?  I could sit here and tell you all about other ridiculous things from those years, but maybe another time, as they have to do with stories that I write.  Despite the dumb shit, I did turn out well-rounded and keep a "to each their own" attitude about how people live their lives.  Hey, as long as you're happy, so am I, so what if you're sacrificing small forest creatures in your basement at night?  I'm just sayin....

Cameron and I are getting together for drinks here soon.  We'll see how all that goes.  It'll be nice to see him after all this time and catch up with what's been going on in his life.......

(Me from waaay back when I moved here)

No, I Didn't Get Any.....

But I'm feeling a little more "put together" today.  Let me just say, this shit I've got going on is ridiculous.  I've never met dudes who weren't interested in JUST SEX.  Seriously?  If I were a guy, I would serve your species perfectly.  If a reasonably good lookin chick thought I was hot and just wanted to have sex, no strings attached, I'd do it IN A HEARTBEAT.......   I thought that's how guys were wired... I guess not.  I keep meeting these guys that want a RELATIONSHIP.  They want to love me and take care of me and blah, blah fucking blah.  Seriously?  I don't need all of that.  I just want someone around to have sex.  That's it.  I don't want to know about your life, what you've been through, how much you do or don't work, anything about your kids, none of that crap.  I want to know that you have a dick and it works, all the time.  That's it.

Is this an indication of how my weekend went?  Well yeah it is.... Tattoo Guy is out (unless he texts me, then he's back in, I'm just sayin....) because he's a workaholic.  If I wanted to be with someone who works 60 hours a week, I'd still be married.  Kyle was back in for a brief moment and now I have no idea what's going on.  Things aren't the same between me and him, so when he leaves next week, I'll be done with all that.....Maybe.....  When he came over last week I was wrecked with guilt over the way I treated him.  This is why I should have never gotten involved with him relationship wise.....  It's better to just continue to be the Ice Princess (that's how the ex-husband refers to me) and not let anyone close.  I don't need all the drama that relationships produce.  End of story....

In other news, Cassie and her kid are arriving to move in tonight.  I gotta get the house cleaned up when I get home.  Little Ev has started to see his dad, which is a post in itself that maybe I'll get to tonight.  I'm quite surprised how all of the stuff with him has turned out quite honestly.  Maybe my asshole magnet was out for repair when I met this guy.  Fuck me for not giving him more of my attention back in those days....  Oh well...

What else?  I don't know.  I'm still a little scatterbrained right now.  Hopefully by tomorrow everything will be right with the world and I can fill in everything that's gone on lately and I've got pics as well.  Stay tuned....

Sexually Frustrated........Yeah, That's It

Lots of stuff has happened since we talked last.  I just can't form the words I want to right now because I haven't had sex in like a week and that makes me not able to function.......

We will return to our regularly scheduled programming once I get laid......  That's it for now..... Don't laugh at my misfortune.

Random Friday Notes

Because I'm still working on this fucking customer catalog for my mother.  Luckily I should be able to get it done by this afternoon and move on.  I hate the design of it.  I hate ripping off other peoples substandard work when I know I could have produced something much better.  This is what she wanted, so this is what she gets.  I think she's going to look like a tool at her presentation with a copied catalog, but that's none of my business......

In other news, thanks for your nice comments yesterday.  I really appreciated it.  I ended up getting a phone call from Melissa apologizing for her being such a bitch and interfering with my life.  Shocker, but ok whatever.  It's water under the bridge now.  Her and Cassie came to Gavin's choir concert last night, then to my house so that Cassie could talk to the boys about moving in and make sure they were comfortable with it.  I guess Cassie and her boy will be back up and ready to move in next Thursday.  That will be interesting to say the least.  I mean come on, my house has 4 bedrooms, but they're not exactly big.  The house itself is a little over 1200 square feet, with 300 of it being the master bedroom and bathroom.  So I live nicely, everyone else in the house is a little cramped.  I don't want her to stay too long, so it's probably ok that it'll be cramped.

Hmmm, what else?  I'm listening to Bob & Tom on the radio and they're talking about bedazziling your lady parts, now known as vagazziling (that sounds DIRTY).  It's totally cracking me up that they're doing it in the studio today after talking about it all week.  Anybody ever done this before?  I'm kinda interested......  I mean, now that I know someone who has a tattoo down there... OH YEAH, remember that story?  About the hoochie tattoo?  Guess who did the tattoo?  Oh yeah, it was Tattoo Guy.  I'm sure that was fun stuff....

Speaking of Tattoo Guy, I'm thinking I should have just been happy with Kyle instead.  Since I saw him on Monday, we've only texted a couple of times and he has to work all weekend.  I'm not feeling it.  If I wanted to be with a man that worked 60 hours a week, I'd still be married.  At least then my bills would be getting paid, ya know?  I understand a man that works hard and wants to have nice things, believe me, I've lived life both ways, the overachievers and the underachievers.......  We'll see what happens, but I'm not optimistic about all of it.

Kyle stopped by last night to get his coffee and waffle maker to take to the new house.  It was weird.  He's trying really hard just to be my friend, but it's obvious that we're both uncomfortable with it.  He invited me and Tara out to check out his new place and since I have to go out that way on Thursdays, we'll probably stop by next week.  I don't know.  I'm all confused and stupid right now.  I cried when he left because I still feel bad about the whole situation.  Enough about all that, it's depressing me.....

Hmmm, what else?  I swear I had something else, but then I got distracted again.  Damn ADD.... I was going to post pictures from last weekend, but this stupid new computer is a piece of shit and isn't compatible with my card in my camera.  I'll be taking my old one home this weekend and getting it back up and running.  This Windows Vista shit is gay.  I still don't remember what else I was going to say, oh well, it probably wasn't important anyone. 

I really don't have a whole lot on tap for the weekend.  It's Arnold Fitness Classic weekend, so there will be all sorts of muscle bound meatheads running around all over town showing off their 'roid rage.  If I see any interesting specimens I'll be sure to take pictures.  Who knows, maybe I'll actually go down to the show one day.  There's all sorts of UFC fighters in town so that'd be cool to see.  I don't know, I'm emotionally retarded right now.....

Just A Quickie

I'm ass deep in trying to recreate a catalog here at work with a deadline of Monday.  It's hard infringing on someone's copyright....  Oh yeah, it's not copyrighted, so it's all good.  My God, how do I get myself into these projects....  Oh, now I remember, my "you'll never be good enough" mother works with me and I'm the all accepting want to do a good job daughter...  FUCK.  Anyways, I just wanted to let y'all know I'm still around, just super busy right now.  Other than that, I've only got one other thing going on.

My sister Melissa (mentioned before as BS, for bitchy sister), the one who told me how bad of a person I was and that she didn't want anything to do with me Facebook messaged me yesterday.  Why she didn't pick up the phone, I don't know.  Her best friend since childhood is leaving her husband (something bad is going on, I just don't know the details) and moving up here.  Since I live in an excellent school district and she has a son my kids age, she was wanting to know if I knew of any good housing in my area.  Well sure I do, the house next door is coming up for rent in a few weeks.  I talked to Cassie (the friend) and got her the landlord's number and all that.  She called and is waiting on a return call.  In the meantime, since she wants to go back to South Carolina, pack her shit and go, her and her son are going to be moving in with me so she can get him into school.  Why am I doing this?  Because I'm a good person, no matter what my sister says.  Because if it were any of my friends in this position and my sister was in a position to help them, she should know that we ALL should help if we can. 

The bottom line is, the hood heals people.  It takes those of us who are broken and in need and fixes us, makes us whole again.  The people that live in my neighborhood, my friends, are quite possibly some of the best people anywhere.  It's time we bring somebody new in and help her heal from whatever it is that reduced her to a crying mess on my phone this morning, profusely thanking me for lending my couch to sleep on for awhile.  You don't just turn people in need away, no matter how much your sister thinks you're a big piece of shit.  SUCK IT MELISSA........

The Carpet Doesn't Match The Curtains.....

I have absolutely nothing of any importance to say today.  I was looking through the pictures on my iPhone though and realized I forgot to share some gems with all of you...  Lucky you.  Without further ado, I present to you these fine pieces of photography.

 

  

  

I found this fine piece of clothing on the clearance rack at Macy's.  Why the hell was it on the clearance rack, damn it??  EVERYONE NEEDS a sweater/vest/chest of man hair.  I mean, really.  Tara and I couldn't stop laughing. She actually took these pictures while laying on the floor of the dressing room in between fits of laughing and crying at this mess. 

All I'm gonna say about the sweater/vest/chest of man hair is that if it wasn't still $30 ON CLEARANCE I totally would have bought it and rocked it out one night just to see how many people at the bar would feel me up....... Damn designer clothing.....

Zodiac Compatibility, Do You Believe In It?

Saturday while I was out grocery shopping, Tattoo Guy was texting me.  It turned into 20 questions, which was interesting because I don't know a whole lot about him other than from the first time I met him, there was this thing between us.  Interestingly, my first statement was, tell me something about you.  Pretty open ended right?  I just wanted to see what I'd get.  He said my last name is ******* and I'm a Scorpio.  Wow, thanks, you just gave me your last name so I can make sure you're not a convicted murder.  Sweet.  I'll use that information later, right now I have to concentrate on remembering baby food, milk and the $200 worth of other things that I need.

For the record I also told him my last name and my zodiac sign, just in case he wanted to search my criminal past as well.....

So that all got me to thinking, especially after Tara got her tattoo the other day and it was all zodiac signs.  Hers, with her kids on the sides.  Do I believe in all that shit?  Honestly, I don't know.  I've never really paid attention to horoscopes and all that.  I mean, I read mine everyday and all, Facebook makes it so easy to do, lol.  I don't know that I believe in the compatibility of myself with other people in that way though.

Let's have a look, supposedly, this is me....My comments about it are in red

Cancer zodiac sign has the symbol of 'The Crab'. One of the basic characteristics of a Cancerian is that he is very prone to mood swings, which are matched by changing emotions (I thought this was called bipolar disorder....). At one point of time, you may have seen him in a typical party mood, enjoying himself and laughing at other people's jokes. He may come across as the most extroverted member in the entire group (Duh, have you read anything that I've written??  I'm the LIFE of the party). However, another time, he may be completely introverted, sitting in a corner and lost in his own world. This single personality trait can help you in identifying a Cancer very easily.

A Cancerian will never run behind fame and publicity, but if he ever gets it, he definitely knows how to bask in the limelight. In a melancholic mood, he can become the coldest person on this earth and drown you in his bottomless depression (Umm, is this why my ex-husband calls me "The Ice Princess?). Cancerians are prone to pessimism and usually hide their fears behind a veil of humor. They love to dream and for them, sky's the limit. When he cries, it is because he is deeply hurt from inside. A harsh glance or a rough tone can easily break Cancer's vulnerable heart.(This is not true.  The Ice Princess doesn't cry because you give her a dirty look, she cries because she just broke her hand punching you in the face for giving her a dirty look....)

When he is hurt, he will either cry his heart out or retreat into a silent spell. However, it is rare that he takes revenge from the one who has hurt him (Oh no, no, no, no, I am a vengeful bitch) . If a Cancer retreats to his shell, you can be sure he will become completely unreachable. He won't pick his phone, answer the doorbell or even check his mail (My God, I don't check the mail because there's never anything good in there, jeez!  It's not because I'm in my shell). Another mood that can engulf a Cancer is a snappy one, or you can say a crabby one. He will hate the world and snap at anything and everything. However, you can be sure he is not angry with you and will soon be his normal self again. 

Ok, so anyways, do you get the point here?  The Ice Princess is validated in her existence.  Deal with me, I'm a moody bitch who gets her way.  Nice.  On to how I mesh with other people..

Scorpios and Cancers

Here is the ideal hook up. These two understand one another before they have their first date. Both are water signs and extremely compatible in love and sex. Sex could turn a one-night stand into marriage. (Let's not get ahead of ourselves here....)
 The only problem arises when Cancer becomes moody (Here we go again, it's all about me...). When Cancer gets moody, Scorpio can withdraw and seem selfish. The more Cancer clings to Scorpio, the worse it gets (Ugh, I'm soooo not a clingy girl..). Scorpio needs to understand that Cancer is more sensitive than they appear and Cancer needs to know that Scorpio is very faithful but will desire moments of privacy occasionally. Be extra careful and cautious around full moons with your feelings(OH FUCK we just had to bring full moons into the picture didn't we?  Full moons make me psycho), Cancer. Scorpio would appreciate less frowns and more compliments. Cancer rules the moon and Mars and Pluto rule Scorpio. They will both bring out the beauty of the other and there is a tendency to look physically more attractive together than when apart(What?  I will look hotter standing next to a Scorpio?  Sign me up). Scorpio will make Cancer feel loved like never before and Cancer will give Scorpio all that attention that they need. Sex and love are very possible (Uhh, I wouldn't call it a possibility, well, the sex part anyway...). Strong sexual compatibility and loyalty will survive any stormy moments.  A marriage will be successful.(Have I made it ABUNDANTLY clear I never want to get married again?  I don't care how hot whatever we've got is....Not happening.)
What does any of this mean?  I don't know, but it sure was a fun read and post.  For the record, I should never be with another Cancer, a Libra or a Capricorn.   Funny that two of my kids dads fall into those signs.... Maybe I should have taken more interest in this say, 15 years ago???
 

Stay Outta The Women's Restroom Damn It!

Ugh Monday, I hate it when you smack me in the face like this...  I'm coming off of a FABULOUS weekend.  Friday night was just ok.  I spent the evening doing stupid shit around the house and eventually Tara came and picked me up to head over to the local watering hole.  The place was packed and for the first time ever, we didn't have a table.  I hate just standing around in a bar. 

Eventually Tattoo Guy shows up and we're all just chillin, having a good time.  Around 11:00 Tara comes up to me, almost in tears and says she's leaving. Uhh, ok.  I know she's been having some problems with her body lately (girl things) and they've been getting worse.  Maybe that's what the problem is.  Whatever.  I was having a good time with everyone else.  Around 12:30 or so we decided to call it a night and head back to the house. LAME, but I had been up late the night before.

Saturday morning he was up at 8:00 and out the door.  As much as I don't like getting up that early, I do like a man that'll get the hell out.  He had a tattoo to do on one of the Ohio State football players at noon and had to get some stuff done beforehand.  Alright, cool.  I got some motivation and went and got groceries, then came home and cooked my favorite new snack, cheesy hot sausage balls.  Spicy sausage, 16 oz. shredded cheddar cheese, enough Bisquick and milk to hold it all together.  Roll them into balls & cook on 350 till they're brown.  These things are excellent. 

I tried to catch nap because I knew it was gonna be a long night, but little E was making sure that's not happening.  I swear, now that he's all mobile and stuff he never naps.  The good side of all this is that he's sleeping around 12-14 hours a night, so I guess it evens itself all out in the end.  Nicole was without her devil spawn for the day, so around 3:30 I went and picked her up since she was bored and without a car.  After laying around watching all my dvr crap, we decided we were hungry and called Tara to see if she wanted to go and get food with us before we went out.  She didn't, then she did.....  God, I can't deal with moody bitches.... 

Apparently everyone in Columbus wanted Mexican food on Saturday night.  We drove to two different places before we finally found one that didn't have a line out the door.  This one also happens to be my favorite, so it was all good.  We were sat at a table right next to the bathroom and what was that?  Did that man just walk out of the womens restroom?  He sure did...  3 minutes later, another guy did.  WTF is going on here????  In the meantime, there are also women going in there.  Are they not saying anything when they see dudes in there?  Aren't the dudes wondering why there aren't any urinals?  I mean, really?  Finally, after a third guy went in, I took these pictures.

(See?? Clearly Says Women)

(And that's most certainly a dude...#3 to be precise)

Tara said it's because in most places the men's restroom is on the left side.  WTF? Seriously?  I have NEVER IN MY LIFE said, oh, well the women's room is always on the right, I'm going in there.  Whatever.  I couldn't enjoy my margaritas for fear that I would have to use the restroom in this place....  Dinner was good though.  

It was supposed to be girls night out.  Ok, it was, we went to dinner together.  These two are just so fucking depressing right now, it's hard to want to spend any time with them.  I ended up texting Tattoo Guy that if him and Mike wanted to come up and hang out with later, they were more than welcome to.  

We were supposed to go to the beach party up at a bar one of Nicole's other friends works at.  I'd  never been there, but it's a sports bar, so how bad could it suck?  Turns out, the place was pretty cool.  They had a shot luge, sand on the floor and hula hoops for the super drunk people.  Sadly, I didn't see anyone hula hoop, but $7 shots of Patron on the ice luge were pretty cool to watch.  Within the first 45 minutes of us getting there we had each had two rounds of drinks, a shot called A Kick In The Crotch, another shot that was Absolut Acai, cranberry and sprite (which kicked ass!), and two jello shots.  Great, it's 11:00 and we're all kicked in the mouth.  Good thing we have a table......   The boys show up shortly after our last jello shot and are not impressed we have such a head start on them.  Hello guys?  Somebody has to be responsible for getting us home!!  We're there until the bar closes and somehow I only manage to have a $28 bar tab.  Sweet considering one of my drinks costs around $6-$7.  Tara & Mike leave, Tattoo Guy and I hop in my car and Nicole decides she's having some after party time with people she works with.  Cool, I didn't wanna take her all the way home anyway.  Around 4 I find sleep....  Or maybe that's just called passing out.....

Ev is up at 7.  I'm still drunk.  Good thing Gav is my early morning kid.  I plop E down with him and go back to bed.  Finally around noon I'm not so drunk and can function.  I'm hoping Tattoo Guy will leave so I can get some things done.  He doesn't.  He asks what Bran is playing on the Xbox.  It's Modern Warfare 2.  Oh cool, his son wants this game too and he wants to see how cool the graphics are.  Bran wants him to play because Gav won't.  He does FOR LIKE A FREAKING HOUR AND A HALF.  I continue to go about my business picking up a house that looks like a tornado hit.  When he's done he comes out to the kitchen and talks while I throw assorted things into the crockpot for dinner.  Finally his kid calls and he leaves at 2:30.  WTF? 

Other than a few loads of laundry and some yummy chicken and biscuits, I really don't get much accomplished yesterday.  I'm thinking about him and trying to figure out if all this is going to go anywhere.....