Obviously.....

I'm not allowed to talk about what happened last Sunday night because of the ongoing police investigation.  If you want to read what the media is reporting about all of it, all you need to do is Google "stabbing in Hilliard, Ohio."  If you want a good insight into people's ignorance with the whole thing, read the Columbus Dispatch story and the 500ish comments that follow.  What a bunch of ignorant fucks we have living around here.  I actually had to stop reading all media reports of the incident because they were so grossly incorrect that it was just further inhibiting me being able to go back into the place.

What I can say is that on Monday morning my mother gave me an ultimatum.  I could either quit my job or she was taking the kids.  She took the kids.  The big ones anyway.  It was a rough day, but I needed to let go of them for a minute because quite honestly I couldn't take care of them in the state I was in anyway.  She explained to them that I needed some time to regroup and get things at home back together so they would be staying with her for awhile.  What she didn't take into consideration was that I had to pick E up on Tuesday evening and though him sleeping in my bed curled up with me made me feel better it was also exhausting running around after him when I had no energy at all from my lack of sleep.

I went to my day job on Monday after not sleeping at all Sunday night.  It was a rough day and my mother causing a scene at work didn't help matters, but I just couldn't sit at the house all day thinking about everything.  My friend Sandi took me up to the bar after work to collect my purse since the police wouldn't let us take anything on Sunday night.  It was pretty gut wrenching to go into there and see it all put back together as if nothing happened.  I took one look at the owner and the other bartender that was there Sunday night and started to sob.  I don't know that my Monday could have gotten much worse at that point.  We went out and had drinks and I attempted to eat.  By the time I got home Monday night I was exhausted, but glad one of my favorite people had come to visit and stay with me.  I might have crashed out from exhaustion in record time.

As the days went on, things started to get a little better.  I returned to work on Wednesday night, drawing a heavy breath as I walked in the door.  I was greeted by my regulars and a crowd that was ready to carry on with business as usual.  That was exactly what I needed.  The other bartender came up because she was still feeling anxious about being there at night and everyone showed us an incredible amount of love.  It was a good night.

Not much else to report on all that.  The dead are buried, the accused sits in jail trying to get out on a $200k bond.  I can't even believe they offered bond on two counts of murder, but it's whatever I guess....

I'll post some other items of note in my next post.  I just wanted to get all of this out there because I know you guys love me and I've just not been able to respond to the emails and comments....