Plenty of Fish in the Toilet.....

So, I know most of you like to read about my social life and the dating situations I seem to find myself in.  Last week I decided that my life wasn't nearly as fulfilled as I would like it to be and that I needed to create an online dating profile.  I have no clue how many of you have done this before, but it was my first time venturing into this arena figuring what's the worst that could happen?  Good lord, what a freak show.  While I'm there chasing around pieces of ass that are out of my league and look like this:

I'm getting responses to my profile by guys like this:

I know, I know, I know, you can't judge a book by its cover, blah, blah, blah, but if I'm not physically attracted to someone right off the bat, at least a little bit, I'm not interested.  I can't help it, I'm a little shallow like that.

I've gotten over 200 messages and requests to meet in a week.  Most of them propositions for sex.  Nice.  If I wanted a casual encounter I would have posted on Craigslist thank you very much.  Out of the 200 or so messages I've gotten, I've responded to 10.  Those 10 have been reduced even further to 3 that I might actually go on a date with.  Seeing as I'm not driving right now, I'm not sure how I'll actually meet any of the three.  I guess we'll have to wait and see what happens, lol.  In the meantime, thank you Plenty of Fish for entertaining the crap out of me this week.

On the people I actually interact with on a daily basis front, Josh is definitely out after his St. Patty's Day stunt.  Asshole.  Sean, the Stage 5 Clinger, is officially out because he pissed me off pushing at me to be exclusive with him and also by acting like a douche at my work. 

I've been hanging out with Brandon for a couple of weeks now, off and on, but he's just going to further complicate my life.  He's in the middle of a huge divorce battle and quite honestly, the only reason I think we hang out is because neither of us wants to be alone.  He serves a purpose, but I doubt it would ever go much further than it is right now.  See though?  We're cute, even if I do look a little drunk.....

The two other ones aren't really worth talking about right at this point other than to say, I just want to touch this when I go out with it later tonight.  Yummy and out of my league, but he's convinced he wants to hang out with me since I knew him back in the day.......  We'll see what happens.....

Oh Yeah....

I had a couple of pictures to share from that last post....

 Jimmy, our resident Leprechaun

 Shellie and I, the two main bartenders at the bar :)

 St. Patty's Day me :)

I'm always in awe of just how patchwork everything looks from an airplane!!

So, Let's Get On With It

Randomness, that's about all you're gonna get from me this time around.  So, what's new? You ask.  Well, not a whole lot I suppose.  I worked about 82 hours last week and spent a day and a half spent out in Kansas City for work.  It kind of went like this:
Monday-Job 1: 7am-4pm, run home, change clothes Job 2: 4:30pm-3:00am

Tuesday-Drag ass out of bed to get on airplane at 8am, arrive in Kansas City at 11:30, get lunch and work until almost 6.  My friend Chip drove in from Arkansas, picked me up where I was working and we hit the casino and proceeded to lose large amounts of money and drink until all rational decisions went right out the door at Harrah's.

Wednesday-Get up just in time to shower and get dropped off at airport while plane is already boarding.  Arrive back in Columbus at 4:30, drive out to pickup E and arrive back home shortly after 6.  Shower to get airplane cooties off me and at Job 2 by 7.  Work until almost 3:30 am

Thursday- Job 1: 7am-4pm.  Go home, say hello to children I haven't seen in weeks now and crash for a few because I'm supposed to be at Job 2 at 9.  Arrive at job 2 at 9 for the St. Patty's Day party.  They aren't busy enough to need me to work, so I proceed to get ridiculously drunk.  Josh shows up and gives me his usual speech about how we should be together.  I make the unwise decision to go to Waffle House with him for some after party grub.  We proceed to argue more in Waffle House and I tell him I'll walk home.  He says fine.  When we get out to the car I proceed to start walking toward home.  He makes it through the traffic light, tells me to get in and I respond with a FUUUUUUCK YOOOOUUU!  He takes off.  I should have known he would leave me there.  You know, normal guys would wait for me to learn my lesson and wait maybe at the bottom of the hill for me because it's obvious I'm still drunk and not dressed appropriately for the 3.5 mile walk home.  Not Josh.  He left me there.  Brandon (not my kid, another one I'm seeing occasionally) calls and says he's too drunk to come get me.  I tell him I'm fine and if he'll just talk to me while I'm walking it'll be all good.  I'm in a creepy industrial part of town.  I'm not scared, but it's still creepy.  My phone dies.... Fuck.  Ok then.  I walk and walk and walk.  Holy shit it takes a long time.  1 1/2 hours later I arrive at my house barefoot (because the high top Chuck Taylors are definitely not made for walking) and exhausted.  Crash and burn at 3:30.

Friday- Back up and at Job 1 at 7:00.  Damn, I'm too old for this shit.  I don't even know what went on at work this day.  I think I was pretty much Living Dead Girl.  Ugh.  Get picked up at 4, go home, change clothes and am at Job 2 by 4:30.  I have some boy text drama, which I'll outline in another post.  The crowd isn't deep, but those that are there are keeping me busy because it's apparent they are drinking off their St. Patty's day hangovers.  Finally done around 3:30 and head home.  CRASH out till my alarm goes off at 11 the next morning.

Saturday-Back to Job 2 at 1pm.  Lazy day with the old guys playing Keno.  It's a welcome relief.  Off work at 7, go around the bar to my normal seat and join the party as a patron.  I make it till like 9.  Brandon and I are off to the house to watch UFC.  I made it through like 3 fights and pass out.

Sunday-I wake up and forget where I am.  Oh yeah, home.  I look over and Brandon laughs at me for falling asleep so early Saturday night.  Oh well, he knows how much I've been working because he's my normal ride home from the bar.  I manage to get myself up and showered.  We decide I need food, something that I've been lacking on the regular for weeks now, and subsequently have dropped like 10 lbs, so we go eat.  Damn it, time for work again.  FUCK....  Work Job 2 from 1-8, pretty busy due to the basketball games, then move myself to the other side of the bar for a few.  I'm still fairly uncomfortable about being at work on Sunday nights, so Brandon takes me home around 11.  I convince him that I sleep better when he stays, so he does. Yay, sleep.

Monday- Start my week all over again at 7am, head to court for my custody dispute with E's dad, where it's determined he needs a Guardian at litem and our case is continued.  Fuck, there goes another $500.  Head back to Job 1, finish out the day there, go home, change clothes and head to Job 2, where I close it down around 2:30 with people trying their hardest to get me drunk.  Ugh.

Yesterday- Was less than productive at Job 1, picked up E from his dad and was home by 5:30.  I wanted sleep but my mom is running Gavin to soccer and I knew she would bitch me out if I took a nap.  So I cleaned.  My house was disgusting being as I wasn't home one night last week.  Ugh.  I managed to get through the laundry and get my room and the kitchen cleaned up.  That was all I had in me.  By 8:30 I was in bed having a hard time staying awake.  Brandon called and woke me up around 10 asking if he could come hang out for awhile and of course I said sure.  He only stayed for like an hour and I was back asleep 5 minutes after he walked out the door.

Today-Well, it's another long day.  Finishing up here at Job 1, which was relatively slow today and have to be at Job 2 by 7.  I'm living the dream I tell ya.  You know what would be really nice?  It would have been great if I could have bought myself something a little more than lunch this week with the almost thousand dollars I made at the bar last week.  Instead I turned around and gave my attorney money, paid up on soccer and paid for baseball.  I know, I know, I'm paying for things that need to be paid for, have groceries and all my utilities are actually caught up right now.  It just feels like I'm slaving away for nothing.  Ugh.  Hopefully I don't work myself to death and can actually enjoy making the money that I do someday....

Tomorrow we'll talk about the current boy situation if nobody breaks their computer between now and then, which will quite honestly take a miracle....

Obviously.....

I'm not allowed to talk about what happened last Sunday night because of the ongoing police investigation.  If you want to read what the media is reporting about all of it, all you need to do is Google "stabbing in Hilliard, Ohio."  If you want a good insight into people's ignorance with the whole thing, read the Columbus Dispatch story and the 500ish comments that follow.  What a bunch of ignorant fucks we have living around here.  I actually had to stop reading all media reports of the incident because they were so grossly incorrect that it was just further inhibiting me being able to go back into the place.

What I can say is that on Monday morning my mother gave me an ultimatum.  I could either quit my job or she was taking the kids.  She took the kids.  The big ones anyway.  It was a rough day, but I needed to let go of them for a minute because quite honestly I couldn't take care of them in the state I was in anyway.  She explained to them that I needed some time to regroup and get things at home back together so they would be staying with her for awhile.  What she didn't take into consideration was that I had to pick E up on Tuesday evening and though him sleeping in my bed curled up with me made me feel better it was also exhausting running around after him when I had no energy at all from my lack of sleep.

I went to my day job on Monday after not sleeping at all Sunday night.  It was a rough day and my mother causing a scene at work didn't help matters, but I just couldn't sit at the house all day thinking about everything.  My friend Sandi took me up to the bar after work to collect my purse since the police wouldn't let us take anything on Sunday night.  It was pretty gut wrenching to go into there and see it all put back together as if nothing happened.  I took one look at the owner and the other bartender that was there Sunday night and started to sob.  I don't know that my Monday could have gotten much worse at that point.  We went out and had drinks and I attempted to eat.  By the time I got home Monday night I was exhausted, but glad one of my favorite people had come to visit and stay with me.  I might have crashed out from exhaustion in record time.

As the days went on, things started to get a little better.  I returned to work on Wednesday night, drawing a heavy breath as I walked in the door.  I was greeted by my regulars and a crowd that was ready to carry on with business as usual.  That was exactly what I needed.  The other bartender came up because she was still feeling anxious about being there at night and everyone showed us an incredible amount of love.  It was a good night.

Not much else to report on all that.  The dead are buried, the accused sits in jail trying to get out on a $200k bond.  I can't even believe they offered bond on two counts of murder, but it's whatever I guess....

I'll post some other items of note in my next post.  I just wanted to get all of this out there because I know you guys love me and I've just not been able to respond to the emails and comments....

Murder

I'm probably not going to be around a whole lot this week.  At work last night I was witness to a double homicide and one of my very good friends is in the hospital with stab wounds.  I'm still very much in shock and unsure how to cope with something of this magnitude.  When I'm ready to talk about it you'll be the first to know.  Please send many hugs and much love my way.  I need it right now.

We Need To Catch Up.....

Yeah, I'm well aware I've left you hanging for like two weeks now.  My bad.  Shit is just super ridiculous with my life right now.  I still haven't gotten a chance to respond to all your emails, but I promise I'll get to it.

So, what's been going on? you ask.  I guess not a whole lot that I really want to talk about.  I made 3 court appearances and my kids had 4 doctor appointments last week.  Try figuring that all out when you can't drive ANYWHERE.  Let's step back for a minute in case you haven't read between the lines or I wasn't perfectly clear about what's been happening.  Back in mid-November I got a DUI.  It happens.  I'm over it.  I've actually joined the majority of people I know by now having at least one.  Perhaps I need to pick better friends....  My mother now has three daughters that have been convicted of DUI and one daughter killed by a drunk driver.  Ugh.  Anyway, back to the story.  That happened.  Two weeks later I got busted driving under suspension twice because, well, I had to get to work and my original DUI case was continued a ridiculously long time, so I didn't get driving privileges for quite some time.  Went to court for the suspension thing and ended up getting 5 days in jail, suspended, with the provision that I had no violations while I was under probation for a year.

My DUI court date wasn't until January 29th.  I went in and was found guilty (duh), but my judge delayed my sentencing until after I completed my 72 hour rehab stint so he wouldn't have to put me on reporting probation.  Ugh.  I just wanted to get everything done and over with right there, but it saved me some money to do it that way, so it's whatever I guess.  I was granted very liberal driving privileges and sent on my way, to be sentenced on March 28th.  I had to go back and get it changed because of the new job, but that wasn't a problem.   Everything was ok again and I could do the majority of things I wanted/needed to do.

Fast forward to two Fridays ago.  I wasn't thrilled to be working a double shift on a Friday, but with all the fines and that crap, I pretty much couldn't say no.  Let's face it, I wouldn't say no to a Friday night no matter what I had going on....  That's good money right there. 

The crowd was good, the band was good, it was an all around good night until about 11:30.  Josh walks in.  I had said a couple of posts ago that I was planning on seeing him.  I didn't that night because he was too lazy to come over to my house.  It's been months since I've seen him.  He's shit faced & I remember that it's his birthday.  Ugh.  I'm trying to work and he's incessantly texting me from the other side of the bar.  His friends leave and he stays.  Ok then, guess he's going home with me.  Great, just what I need.  At 2:30, I'm done working and trying to get him to the car.  He's busy puking in the parking lot.  Great.  Not only am I not getting laid, but he's puking.  Awesome....  I manage to get him into the car and we set off for my house.  It's only about a mile from the bar to my house and I take the back way to avoid any police.

So I thought anyway.  I go through the back of the neighborhood and just as I'm putting on my turn signal to turn onto my street I notice there are three police cars blocking my turn.  Umm, ok then.  I continue to go straight and at the stop sign make a left so that I can just go in the front of the neighborhood.  As soon as I pull out from the stop sign the cop is behind me.  I accelerate for the whole hundred yards it is to the front of the neighborhood and turn in.  The police car lights up as I pull into the hood.  Fuck.  Just what I need.  Oh, and look, it's Officer Turner, the SAME officer that pulled me over for both of my driving under suspensions.  Fucking fabulous.  He comes up to the car and says "Tara, I didn't think you were eligible to get your license back so soon."  I roll my eyes and say back "Officer Turner, you very well know that I don't have a driver's license, but I'd be happy to show you my driving privileges."  He's not amused.  I pull out my privileges.  He takes them back to his car. 

Eventually he comes back and tells me my ALS (automatic license suspension) is over and my privileges are no longer valid, plus I was 10 minutes outside of my driving time anyway.  I immediately go into panic mode because I'm on probation and a violation sends me to jail for 5 days.  I'm too pretty for jail!!!!  I freak out.  He asks me if I've been drinking.  I tell him no, I had just gotten off work.  He asks why my car reeks of alcohol.  I point at the birthday boy.  He's not buying it.  Ugh.  He asks me to get out of the car and does field sobriety tests.  He says I fail, but I'm in bare feet on concrete that's just about frozen because my feet hurt from my shoes.  I'm tired, you know, working a 17 hour work day tired.  He handcuffs me and takes me to the police station. 

I refuse a breathalyzer test because if there's one thing I learned from the first time, it's NEVER blow.  It's easy for everyone else to say, well if you weren't drunk, you should have just blown to prove a point.  Umm no, that's not happening.  Truth is, I did have a couple of drinks earlier in the evening and I know that those machines aren't all that accurate (believe me, I've seen it fought out in court several times since November), so I wasn't about to get a second DUI in three months.  I'm sitting in the police station handcuffed to the bench hysterical over the fact I'm probably going to jail and didn't even realize my privs were suspended again or I FOR SURE wouldn't have been driving.  Eventually he gets done with his paperwork and they drive me home.  It's 6am.  Ugh.  I spend most of the morning sleeping and trying to figure out how the hell I'm going to get my car out of impound yet again.  Sean calls and I tell him what happened.  He says we'll go on Sunday and get it out and not to worry about it.  Ugh, ok then....  I head off to work at 1, having a nice mile walk there.  I hate walking.....

Monday rolls around and I call my attorney that's handling my custody case.  He tells me for $2500 more he can probably get it taken care of.  FUCK.  There goes Gavin's trip to Spain for sure.  In the meantime, I head to court on Tuesday to get my driving privs fixed so that I can be out until 3am.  I am sentenced on the spot for that DUI even though I haven't done my stint in rehab yet because the judge is tired of dealing with me.  Sweet, all that bullshit is out of the way.  If only I didn't have the other crap to deal with...  Wednesday I go to court and ask for a continuance so that my lawyer has adequate time to figure out what the hell he's going to do with this mess.  The continuance is no problem even though my mom texts me like a hundred times in the hour I'm there to make sure they didn't automatically cart me off to jail right then and there.

Nothing of note happens on Thursday and Friday brings yet another court appearance.  The one where Jordan filed for emergency custody of Little E.  Two hours in a small little conference room later and the judge has determined that there is no cause for E to be removed from my home.  TAKE THAT DOUCHEBAG!!  Too bad it cost me $500 in attorney fees for that bullshit.  Ugh.  My attorney and I reach an agreement that I'll give him $500 biweekly UNTIL THE END OF TIME to get me out of the other thing.  It's whatever.  I need driving privs back STAT.  I have Sean giving me a ride to work every morning because he feels bad that he acted like a fucking jealous idiot at my work Saturday night, but I'd really like to sever that cord soon!

I mean, what did he think he was signing up for hanging out with a girl that basically gets paid to flirt with guys while she gets them drunk?  Really?  Him and JK obviously have something in common and I feel like if I was dating a girl I'd have less relationship drama....  Ugh.  I need to be rid of him with a quickness, unfortunately until the lawyer can do something about this court case, I'm stuck.  I can't stand being dependent on someone else to get me places and last weekend totally sucked because I had to call my mom every time I needed to do something and wasn't nearly as productive as I would have liked to be.  It is what it is I suppose.  If it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have any luck at all I suppose. 

So at this point I'm just trying to keep my head down and do what I have to do.  It sucks and isn't something that I necessarily want to do, but I don't have a whole lot of choices right now.  I'll get through it like I always do, but I hate to think that just as things were starting to get better they go down the shitter again.  Ugh.

In other news, I didn't do the photo shoot two weekends ago.  The weather was just waaaaay too shitty to do anything outside or even provide any decent lighting for indoor pics.  Hopefully I'll get them done soon, since the weather appears to be letting up on us a little bit.  Gotta run now my peeps, must finish out the day at Job 1, go pickup Little E and head out to Job 2.  Really, I'm leading a fucking glamorous life.... I swear....

Just a Quickie :)

To let y'all know that I'm doing a photo shoot all day on Sunday.  I have no idea what we'll be getting into, but it's sure to be lots of fun like last time.  Probably even more fun considering I'm a little more comfortable with the whole thing and due to the fucking stress in my life lately I'm down like another 10 lbs, which always makes me happy...  By the time Monday rolls around I'm hoping to have a bunch of them edited so you can see them.  Have a great weekend everyone :) Love ya!