Facebook Is Ruining My Life

Ok, well maybe not ruining it, but it is making it really weird here lately.... I fought for a long time against the norm of having a MySpace or Facebook. Honestly, I wasn't all that interested in finding people from my past or having them find me.

Last year after the big 30th birthday bash, I finally gave in and setup a MySpace page. All my bitches had posted their pics there and refused to let me see them unless I got a page. So I did. I'll be honest, I like it. I am super selective of who I let be my "friend", mostly because that's where I post the worst of the worst party pictures and write some all out flames about people I hate.  I would have put up with a lot less crap over the last year had it not been for MySpace.

Facebook on the other hand, is the devil. There are so many people on there and I'm a little more than intrigued to see what has happened to them. I don't have a ton of "friends" on there, but I have enough and there are some strange ones. Plus my mom now has a page and guilted me into being her friend, so I can't post anything really good there.

A couple of posts ago when I was writing about my relationship with Nick I got to thinking about what led he and I to be together. I knew my version of the way things happened and honestly have felt guilty for a long time about it, but I knew there was more to the story. A guy, Brad, is my "friend" on Facebook. I friend requested Brad about a month ago to see if he'd actually accept my request. He did and we occasionally message back and forth, mostly because we're both addicted to Mafia Wars.

Another friend and I were messaging about things we would tell people if there would be no negative recourse from doing so. Let me tell you what, this is kinda fun. Being slightly intoxicated I decided to open the floor to anyone who had something to say to me. Who had something to say? Brad did. His message simply stated this "I didn't like going from driving my girl's car to sittin bitch in the back seat".

See, Brad and I had been seeing each other back in the day. Things were weird with us though. I can't really go into detail because it's weird (no, not in a sexual way....), but he and I had just had this thing. He and I had the same close circle of friends, which made things even more interesting. Looking for a quick way to end it, I hooked up with his right hand man, who just happened to be Nick. Or so I thought. Long story short, the truth comes out. Brad set me up. He made sure Nick and I got together because I was too nice of a girl to be with him. . Really? Is that how it is? Because let me just say this. I have NEVER been a nice girl, especially back then. I was a user and an abuser. Hell, I still am kinda. But anyways, he was right, his position of driver eventually went to bitch in the back seat to him not hanging out with us at all. I've seen him probably twice since all that went down.

Anyways, the whole thing just made me step back for a minute and think about things. Brad, in one night, changed the rest of my life. I'm pondering two questions from all this:
1. Did I really want to know the truth?
2. What sort of things have I done that have changed the rest of someone's life?

The answer to #1 is pretty easy. I could have lived the rest of my life not knowing the truth about all that. N and I have been through so much shit, I don't even want to think about how different my life would have been without him. #2, well, I can think of a ton of stuff I've done. I seriously hope I didn't fuck up anyone's life too bad. If I did, I'm sure I'll hear about it on Facebook someday......